Indian Defence Review

The numerous wounds on the bodies of all the members of this group bore mute testimony that no one in this group had failed to do whatever lay in their power in defence of the motherland. How then could the senior officers, both civilian and military, whose erroneous decisions had landed us in dire straits, assume a holier-than-thou attitude?

Surprisingly, our lightly wounded colleagues who were repatriated some time after us, and those officers and men who had successfully managed to slip out of the difficult operation without any physical damage to their person, were not subjected to the pressures and humiliations that we were made to experience. By the time of their arrival, all the public hue and cry about the defeat of the once invincible Indian Army had subsided and with that the quest for scapegoats. By this time, the inexperience of the army debriefing teams had also vanished reducing pressure on the intelligence officers to categorise more and more people as having been brainwashed by the enemy. The brainwashing fever was clearly on the ebb now.

Though New Delhi is the seat of the Government, with numerous government departments and agencies, located within a few miles of the military hospital, no elected or nominated Government official ever dropped by to enquire into our well-being. While, before the start of the hostilities, a large number of military top brass and a similarly large number of elected office holders on the civilian side, like the Prime Minister and the General Officer Commanding-in-Chief had come all the way from their comfortable hide-outs in New Delhi to the comparatively inaccessible and inhospitable NEFA region to pay us a visit, when we returned to New Delhi as a defeated group of soldiers, we were completely ignored. The Prime Minister, the Defence Minister and the President of India, the latter also being the de facto Commander-in-Chief of all the Indian defence forces, and who were also responsible to a large degree for the misfortunes that had befallen us, who were not only keeping a great distance from us, but were just not approachable through any channel for the redress of our genuine grievances like financial difficulties, family problems, which all of us had in the wake of the national calamity.

A few days after our arrival in the military hospital, a cooking accident in her home brought the wife of one of the ADCs to the President into the military hospital for treatment. She had been housed in the wing next to ours. The ADC concerned got to visiting the hospital daily after the admission of his wife.

On one of his daily visits, I happened to run into this officer, who was a complete stranger to me at that time. This chance meeting with the important personage led to our socialising for a little time in the corridor of the hospital. On learning of my identity, he shook me vigorously by the hand and congratulated me for having been nominated for the Vir Chakra (a gallantry award of a high order), which according to him had almost been approved by the Central Government. This unsolicited information coming in from the ADC to the Commander-in-Chief in a casual talk helped to clear my lingering thoughts on the subject. All the clouds of uncertainty vanished at this point, and notwithstanding the dark clouds of ill-will that still hung low over me, I started feeling certain that before long, my meagre contribution in the service of the nation would be publicly recognised. The chance meeting with the ADC had not only helped to dispel all foreboding thoughts from my mind, but also had been instrumental in upgrading the possibility of the grant of a gallantry award into a probability.

This unsolicited information coming in from the ADC to the Commander-in-Chief in a casual talk helped to clear my lingering thoughts on the subject. All the clouds of uncertainty vanished at this point, and notwithstanding the dark clouds of ill-will that still hung low over me”¦

While there were hundreds of us languishing in the hospital due to the injuries we had received in the service of the nation, and were suffering badly due to the resultant physical discomfort as also due to neglect at the hands of the entire officialdom, the President drove into the place one day. From our past experience we should have learnt not to connect VIP visits with our sufferings. But human nature being what it is, when we learnt about the physical proximity of the Commander-in-Chief, our hopes soared to dizzying heights, thinking that at long last the highest elected official of the land had come to atone for our past neglect.

Our disappointment can be well imagined when we learnt that he had come only to pay a courtesy call on the wife of his ADC and that he had gone back to his palatial residence after spending in her company the few moments required by etiquette. This visit still continues to haunt me, in spite of the passage of time and the fact that the President who imparted this cruel kick to those already on their knees at that time has long left this world. I cannot help wondering as to how any Government officer can accord higher priority to the sufferings of a subordinate officer’s wife than to the sufferings of hundreds of soldiers, whose sufferings were due to duties carried out in the service of the nation. This episode left such a bad taste in my mouth that it exists even to this day.

All this while the medical authorities were methodically going about their duties of attending to the injuries of the ex-POWs in their care. Moreover, as time went by, with the regaining of physical health, the bodies started asserting themselves in the matter of repairing all the damaged parts. With this dual assault on the wounds, all the wounded personnel started progressing rapidly. The bullet which had passed through my left wrist had, however, caused irreparable damage. So after a lot of preliminary work, it was decided by the attending surgeon to permanently immobilise the painful wrist by inserting a bone graft in the joint, around which all the shattered pieces would calcify in due course of time. The bone implant was undertaken soon thereafter, and then my physical sufferings were brought down to a tolerable level.

“¦when we as a group neared this important milestone of 120 days, with a majority of us still far from fit to face the outside world, we got to dreading the crossing of this 120 days limit on account of the financial hardship it was bound to cause.

Medical regulations in force at that time made it mandatory for all military personnel in need of extended medical care to go on half pay beyond the initial full pay hospitalisation period of 120 days. In applying this half pay rule the cause of hospitalisation was not given any consideration. For the purposes of pay, it was immaterial if one was in the hospital on account of normal sickness or an account of disabilities suffered through enemy action on a battlefield. Isn’t this a good example of democracy in action in our country! However, when we as a group neared this important milestone of 120 days, with a majority of us still far from fit to face the outside world, we got to dreading the crossing of this 120 days limit on account of the financial hardship it was bound to cause. Though we were promised by the hospital authorities of the issuance of an amendment to the financial regulation so as to exempt us from the 120 days limit, by this time we had lost all faith in the words of any government agency. So, in order to add to our already heavy burden of responsibilities, we opted to be discharged from the hospital just prior to the time when our pays were to be reduced to half. Though, with this discharge from the hospital. I had salvaged my finances from a sure disaster and had also brought an end to my imprisonment at the hands of my own countrymen, I was still in a very poor shape physically. My left arm was in a cast and a sling and the limp in the injured leg was very pronounced at the time of my being declared fit for duty.

My resolve to put my faithful batman up for some suitable award could not be converted into a viable plan of action, due to the impossible circumstances I found myself in on return to Indian soil. Unfortunately, this is not the only act in its category. A lot of such acts of bravery on the battlefield go unreported and thereby unrewarded through the failure of officers to put down the exceptional deeds due to one reason or the other. For my act of omission in this respect, however, there existed a legitimate excuse. I wish I could still find a way to get this soldier his well-merited award. Though my discharge from the military hospital had removed all the physical shackles limiting my freedom of movement and association, I was neither totally fit, nor was I entirely free from the misinformed or misinterpreted actions of the higher-ups, who still chose to be guided by the prevalent brainwash mania. Under the conditions, I felt that my battlefield experience must have been commented on adversely and these adverse comments must have found their way somehow into my service records.

The gallantry award about which I had heard a lot in the foothill camp and again in the corridor of the military hospital never surfaced for some mysterious reason, while the Vishisht Seva Medal took 6 long years in making its appearance. Perhaps in this case it would not be wrong for me to quote a popular adage covering delays of a similar category: Justice delayed is justice denied. And all this, because someone sitting in an office in New Delhi had failed to act in time for some reason or the other.

“¦it would not be wrong for me to quote a popular adage covering delays of a similar category: Justice delayed is justice denied.

Though after being released by the hospital. I was posted out in the normal course, and though thereafter the laid down procedure was meticulously observed in all my subsequent postings, I feel that during the remaining period of the time I spent in military service, I had been unable to wash the brainwashing blot in its entirety. This point became absolutely clear when my turn came up for promotion.

Not only was I not considered for accelerated promotion on the basis of my records, based on my satisfactory service both in times of hostilities and in peace, but on the contrary, was declared unfit for further promotion. On enquiring about the basis of this opinion, I was given the flimsy ground of my medical category being too low for higher ranks. This was a fine way of, rewarding a soldier. He is ordered in the first instance to face the enemy, and when he is injured in the process of carrying out his orders, and his medical category is subsequently lowered as a direct result of his obeying the orders implicitly, he is told that he is no good to the service in the senior ranks. If somehow I had succeeded in abandoning my men and evading the enemy, not only would I have avoided all the miserable experience that I had to undergo, but would have also been considered suitable for further promotion, as neither of the two stigmas – one of having been brainwashed and the other of having been placed in an unacceptably low medical category – would have been able to affect my career in the army.

Notwithstanding the promotion, I was totally disgusted with the service, and was, therefore, glad when I got a chance to emigrate to the USA. I accepted the offer as soon as I could so as to be out of the clutches of my army bosses before they could have any second thoughts on the subject.

This was the last straw. When I was subjected to this indignation at the hands of the Army senior officers in addition to all the inhuman treatments meted out to me till that time, every fibre of my being revolted. When I received a copy of the supersession order, I immediately submitted the request to be relieved of my duties forthwith. In doing so, I had made up my mind to fight the unfair system from the outside, since strict Army discipline does not tolerate its members raising their voice against the decision of its top brass. I had resolved to enlist the help of the already agitated media for my cause in fighting the Army set-up. The political atmosphere could not have been better suited for my project.

However, on seeing my resignation letter, someone in the chain of command had second thoughts and within a few days of my requesting for release from Army service, fresh promotion lists were mailed out reinstating me as per seniority. Notwithstanding the promotion, I was totally disgusted with the service, and was, therefore, glad when I got a chance to emigrate to the USA. I accepted the offer as soon as I could so as to be out of the clutches of my army bosses before they could have any second thoughts on the subject.

To say that I am happy in my present surroundings would be a gross misstatement. I have neither the social status nor the earning capacity or the health that I used to enjoy in the army days. At my age, when all the action is behind me, I can only think of the could-have-beens and the would-have-beens. However, in spite of the powerful kicks handed out to me by fate during my army career, I am comparatively well off and if one were to go by Indian standards even rich in my retirement. I am at complete peace with myself now:, as in spite of everything, I have done well for myself both mentally as well as materially. I, however, miss my mother country badly and long to get back to it. This is the reason of my not having acquired American citizenship till now, though I have been living in this country for the last 18 years. I enjoy my annual pilgrimages to India but the two months trips seem to be of so short a duration that I start planning for the next trip even before getting back home from India.